Emotional training makes you emotionally tough. And staying emotionally tough helps you invest in a brighter future.
I don’t know about the situation you’re in right now. For me, here in Vietnam, the sky is falling. Corona hit like the shadow of death. They shut down the schools and everyone went into panic mode. The stock market is falling and people are considering whether to sell out, lock up and stock-up on canned goods. And they just can’t get enough face masks.
Well that is one extreme reaction.
While some are hiding in their houses, forbidding their kids to step outside, many are going on with life as normal; obviously taking precautions, but generally going about their normal days.
So what makes the big difference in these people’s reactions?
How can one group fall apart in terror, while the other holds it together.
And personally, I think to myself, why am I not shaken by the whole thing?
Even while my wife has serious moments of fear; obsessing about face masks and incessantly checking the news, I’m happy to remain fairly oblivious.
I mean I’m not crazy, I know there is concern and probably great reason to be concerned. And my reaction would be different if I was stuck in WuHan instead of Ho Chi Minh. But to tell you the truth, I’m glad that I am reacting this way.
And I know it’s because of my emotional training. I feel emotionally fit.
What is Emotional Training
Well, just like you would lift weights if you wanted to stay physically fit, you can also do many good things to make sure you are emotionally fit.
Emotional fitness means you are well balanced emotionally. You are mindful and aware of your situation, your emotions and your reactions, and you are able to react to things purposefully because you control your emotions and not the other way around.
There are many great resources out there, for one, I would turn to Unshakeable by Tony Robbins – I think everyone should read this fantastic book. (Start the tour with, How to be a Success: Become Unshakeable (Part 1))
The basic idea is to understand the states of your body, be aware how you can change the states you are in, and work out how to maintain positive states.
So, basically, understand your emotions, learn ways to recognize and change your emotional state and have a strategy to stay in a good emotional state.
Easier said than done.
The best way to start getting emotionally tough:
1. Physiology –
Start by staying ,or getting, physically strong. It’s absolutely true – strong body, strong mind. When you are fit and strong you are confident and you feel more in control. So get fit and strong.
2. Language –
Use positive language in your day. If you’re a complainer, like me, then be mindful of it and try to stop. I used to catch myself complaining all the time, then I decided I didn’t want to be grumpy all the time. SO now I catch myself and tell myself to look for solutions not problems. It makes a big difference.
You should also be mindful of how you label things. If you find yourself labelling work as torture, then it’s no surprise it has a huge painful hold on your life. But if you label it positively, even just to fool your self, then it will take on a whole new appearance.
Furthermore, consider the stories you tell. Tell positive stories to yourself and feel positive about life and the future. Don’t imagine yourself suffering and battling. Imagine living in abundance living the life of your dreams. It may be mere fantasy, but it will make you feel good and give you something to aim for.
3. Mindset –
Feed your mind positive and empowering content. If you are watching the news everyday, there’s little wonder you feel stressed, anxious and powerless. I skip the news and instead watch, or read, anything I can find that’s about making me smarter, stronger, fitter, and more successful. You are what you think. Think improvement and empowerment and you’re on your way.
4. Stay balanced –
Balance your mind and spirit with yoga and meditation. Whether you believe in the magical side or not, the simple act of slowing down and stretching away the stress will help you to find peace, focus and emotional balance.
5. Stick to principles –
You know how the world works. Don’t change your approach because of fear or excitement. Diseases come and go. We will find a way to control this one. Be smart, but don’t throw in your job, your investments, your lifestyle (completely) because of a reckless overreaction to whatever is the latest big terror in your life.
The main thing to do is to take time and be mindful of your reaction.
How I got emotionally tough
I got into the habit of doing these types of things about a year ago.
Since then, I started to have a positive morning routine, I developed a habit of being consciously grateful, I became mindful of my state and I did things to put myself into a good state. I started to get physically fit. I started reading and watching positive influences and learning lots of empowering things. And I studied the experts in my fields, learning the principles and discovering how to be proactive and seek success in life. Finally, I even took up yoga and meditation. (Though I’m not that disciplined at these two, and I need to work on that.)
And collectively, what all that does is to keep me in a mindful state; a state where I am aware of how I feel and aware of what is acting on me and aware of how I can alter my state for good. And so when things happen, I’m prepared for the good, and/or the bad, and I am able to react in a way that will be positive for me.
The one thing we can control is our reaction. We can react with fear or we can be bold and stride forward bravely.
If we are scared, nervous, stressed and so on, we react with fear and we react to defend ourselves. That is natural, but it starts with fear and that only compounds fear and breeds negative momentum.
I believe we need to be bold. Take a serious look at the situation and make a smart and well considered approach to dangerous situation. I refuse to act out of fear and respond in a reckless, equally dangerous, manner.
For example right now with the Corona Virus:
Right now, we can be scared and go into lock down so we don’t breathe the infected air. Or we can be brave enough to weigh up the situation, take care, but get things done.
Yes, life is dangerous right now. But life is always potentially dangerous.
Be bold, be strong, be smart, and make decisions with the view of a successful future.
Extremely Emotionally tough
At the extreme of this training is the emotional warrior.
I’m getting there, at least in my mind.
In my mind, I’d rather go down swinging than sit down and accept that I am powerless.
Like Deontay Wilder getting smashed by Tyson Fury. He had no chance of coming back, but he would rather go out on his shield. And that’s the way I want to live. I hate to see fear and weakness.
Be bold, to fearlessly take on life’s challenges and never take a step backwards.
I’m not quite there, but I feel I’m on the way.
And so we are struck with the dilemma of what to do in these turbulent times.
And I believe now is the time to be bold.
Be bold and invest to be emotionally tough tomorrow:
- Invest in yourself – All this worry about sickness seems, to me, the perfect time to think about your health, getting fit and getting strong. Being physically fit helps you do the hard work, helps you go above and beyond, and helps you get noticed. It helps you get success. So while others are freaking out about health issues, get proactive and improve your health today.
- Invest in the economy – Right now, when everyone is worried about business and markets surviving the economic downturn caused by Corona, is the perfect time to look for good value. As an investor, it’s time to look for something that’s underpriced, for no good reason other than fear, and get it while it’s ridiculously cheap. And if you’re in business, now when there’s a million problems being complained about is the perfect time to consider what value you can provide.
- Invest in your future – Now is the time to think about what are you worried about now because of this threat. This is a global threat that threatens lives. This is when it gets real. Think about how are you prepared and invest so you are prepared in the future
You can’t live your life a nervous wreck.
If death is coming, and it will come for us all, then face it boldly and fight for life the way you want.
“Don’t go gentle … ” stay strong, get bold, and work with each other to stay positive and set up right for what I’m sure will be a more positive future.
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